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Signs You're Not A Religious Accommodationist

There are those who want to give special privilege to religion. They want it to have protection from criticism not afforded other domains like politics or science.

They say that being civil and polite in your dealings with religious people and institutions is a sign of accommodationism, they're wrong.

However, there are some certain signs that you're not being an accommodationist.

The following are clear indications that you are not an accommodationist and are offered in the hope that even the religious among us have a sense of humor.

  1. You say superstitious bastards instead of people of faith.
  2. You volunteer to baptise the neighbor's kids at Niagra falls.
  3. You laugh when people ask you what church you belong to.
  4. You cheer for the lions in the movie "The Ten Commandments."
  5. If in the hospital you prefer cash in lieu of prayers.
  6. You say nice costume to the Pope on Halloween.
  7. You say, are you batshit crazy instead of, oh you're a Catholic, that's nice.
  8. You try to convince the priest there is no god at confession.
  9. If your neighbors don't invite you to church anymore.
  10. If you returned your Templeton Prize.
  11. If you wear an atheist t-shirt
  12. If when you look at the moon you see a celestial body not a smiley face.
  13. If you keep wondering why church goers are always talking to the ceiling. (redseven)
  14. If upon finding an image of the Virgin Mary on your cheese sandwich you snap her head off on your first bite.
  15. If you give up Jewish zombie meat for Lent." (inwit)

 

Comments

  • If you think that if Orthadox Jews are going to walk to temple in the dark on friday nights when you are out and about, they could at least carry a candle or put reflective tape on their all black outfits.

Ok, that one is boring.

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If you ask a Jewish man why he took the little propeller off his hat.

Well, right off the bat I've violated #1, 7, 12, and 14.

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0. The ability to accept others' beliefs without judgment.

Just because you do not believe in a deity does not mean you should stoop to the level of those who force their beliefs on you.

Agnostic Dan, lacks what even some Christians have, a sense of humor.

Well Omega thought they were commandments. Must be a recovering Catholic.

I only meant I do those #'s often enough to not be a religious accomodationist.

oh, that's not a violation in this context.

You are right, insofar as we are judging. But you are also wrong, insofar as you suggest we shouldn't. So long as a belief intends to make an impact on reality, whether it's politics or simply a display of how one thinks, it deserves to undergo a certain amount of scrutiny in order to ascertain whether or not you are thinking properly.

In other words, a childish belief is a childish belief. As Hubert Humphrey once said, "The right to be heard does not automatically include the right to be taken seriously."

If the FSM on your bumper is somehow evolving legs.

If you've ever use the term 'mother nature'

oops, that should have read 'If you laugh at people who use the term 'mother nature'.

She is always getting fertilized by father sky and his sun. makes me snicker.

good one.

I don't know about number 10 - shouldn't you want to remove resources from these wackjobs? I would amend it to read accepted Templeton prize and used it on 'research' for your satirical text, Finding Jesus.

I get this is humor, but I wonder if any of us really does any of these.

I have gotten some flak from close friends for stating things like "the Pope is ignorant" (in Spanish ignorante can be used as a noun, so it would be something like "the Pope is an ignorant" which sounds a bit stronger). If I actually said these things openly I would have even less friends than I do now. Not that I think these things either. I'm not sure what my point is. I just woke up.

Signs that you are a religious accommodationist:

  1. You used to laugh at the story of Leda and the swan, finding it utterly preposterous, but stopped laughing when you realized the myth bore an uncomfortable resemblance to your own religion.

Norm, i've been reading your blog for years, with the pleasant feeling that godless people on the same wavelength often share. i'll certainly keep visiting it as one visits an old friend, though as an old friend, i tell you that this thing starts resembling a circle jerk for atheists with issues (and from a circle jerk to a church, how many strokes?). Just my humble opinion :-)

that's really constructive criticism.

Norm, might this be your Crackergate?

Crackergate, heaven forbid. :) This is just good-natured fun.

Maybe we should link this on the catholic league's site and on Mooney's blog then, get the thing rolling.

"# If you returned your Templeton Prize."

No such beast, sadly. I'm fairly sure no one has ever done it. Of course if you did so you'd effectively be donating a large sum of money to a religious organisation so....

What I think it's only right to see is the following: for Richard Dawkins to win the prize. The argument is quite simple; the prize is for people who have produced work on the relationship between science and religion. Dawkins has unequivocally done that (or if not Dawkins you could give it to Victor Stenger; not fussy). After all, it's surely cheating to say you're offering a prize for people writing on the relationship between X and Y, yet give it out only to those who agree with you about what the relationship is.

I'm with dissenters here.

This just wasn't funny. Could be somewhere between killing kids and utterly un-witty obvious jokes. meh and I AM the one asking pointy questions to my catholic mother in law like "so what parts of the Bible do you NOT believe in?"

-Leviticus? yes or no? -Should I ask if you are menstrating before talking to you? -Was there a talking snake? -Is it ok to sell your kids into slavery or stone them to death?

But no, sorry, this just wasn't funny to me.

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