Jesus helps golfers, huh?

I am ALWAYS amazed at how frikkin' STOOPID people are.

Of course! Anything involving sticks, balls and holes, will definitely concern the Almighty.

the direct link doesn't work... the link points to "http://onegoodmovemedia.org/movies/.mov"

Talked to God after this. He thought it was funny. (But he seemd kinda stoned at the time).

unreal with this. If god even existed like he would give a sh*t about golf. Shouldnt he be busy helping people who actually need it? He had some similar comments on TV too and everyone i was with groaned together. It was so obnoxious and in your face....

^Heretic!

There's an old hockey addage popular since the 70's Jesus Freak era:

Jesus saves, but Bobby Orr scores on the rebound.

Replace Orr with whomever is the player of the moment.

Does anyone here follow MMA? It seems to have gotten really huge over the last few years, so I figure there has to be someone... I love it when those guys thank Jesus after winning a fight... You're hitting, kicking, grappling, yanking and twisting, beating the crap out of someone, trying to strangle them -- if you leave your opponent a bloodied, unconscious mess, hey that's a good thing. So OBVIOUSLY, you gotta give thanks to the Prince of Peace... Right. In one of the earlier UFC tourneys, Kemo came to the ring, dragging a fucking cross. He already had "JESUS" tattooed on his body -- which is already a little funny right there, considering what the bible sez about making marks on your body. But yeah, the dude had a huge fucking cross that he carried on his back, and dragged to the octagon. Holy fucking shit. That ruled.

There's an episode from the excellent "Mr. Deity" youtube show on this topic:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XF--G1zmyTw

Dzwonka,

Yeah I watch MMA fights. UFC/Pride I've watched on youtube (lol) or sometimes in sportsbars with my friends although I'm not an aficionado. I do know what you're talking about though. Standup comedian Pablo Francisco also makes fun of this when he says how rap artists will go to an awards show and say something along the lines of, "Yeah I'd like to thank Jesus for my number 1 hit single...'Suck Yo Momma'..."

P.S.: Last week St. Pierre got his ass kicked bad! I was shocked myself at how quickly the match ended. Oh well, at least the pizza I had was good. :)

Go to www.choosejesusrightnow.com & click on BUMPER STICKERS.

Only people who do not know the Lord can make the kind of mocking comments found here. God by definition is everywhere present, and omniscient. So he is at the golf course, the fights, and with the starving children in Africa without straining at all. Jesus said, "IF any man opens the door, I will come in and commune with him". Try letting God in and you will find out He cares about every little aspect of your life, even if you don't have AIDS or are starving to death.

Guys, before everyone goes crazy with this, just please keep in mind that he never said that Jesus helped him win the tourney, he just said that he felt his presence. So please put away your strawmen, you can burn them again some other time. much obliged.

Oh dear, Jeremy. Tut tut. That was the clear implication. And why does he "feel" Jesus especially at Easter? Isn't Jesus available 24/7/365? If he takes particular interest in manifesting at Easter, when does he take the start and stop points? Wouldn't Easter have been pretty much over in Jerusalem when Zak was starting his round? And does Jesus have to make a repeat performance for the Orthodox Easter? I mean, if they're sincere, surely he wouldn't want to disappoint the Greeks etc. just because they're mistaken about the date.

And wasn't the guy in breach of Commandment 4 (or 3 for some), to wit:

"Remember that thou keep holy the Sabbath-day. Six days shalt thou labour, and do all that thou hast to do; but the seventh day is the Sabbath of the Lord thy God. In it thou shalt do no manner of work, thou, and thy son, and thy daughter, thy man-servant, and thy maid-servant, thy cattle, and the stranger that is within thy gates."

According to this he has doubly sinned because he aided and abetted his caddy, as his manservant, to work on the Sabbath, also.

Bad Zak. Too bad the Pope has recently announced that Hell is, indeed, a "real" place. On second thought, Zak would probably be happy there - I'm sure that's where golf was invented...

The WMDs have been found folks. Yep, Elvis found them and gave them to Jesus for safe keeping. Jesus told George W personally. Would Jesus lie?

I get tired of hearing athletes giving "glory to my lord and personal savior for this victory".

Being a boxing and MMA fan, (my only sport addictions) I have heard that phrase many many times after some seriously hard fought battles.

Two days later the same thanking Jesus for the Victory guy is busted for armed robbery, rape, cocaine, drunk driving, etc.

Athletes tend to be superstitious partly because the slightest unanticipated thing, a hole in the field, a pebble in the wrong spot, so many little things can alter the outcome of competition at that level.

I'm NOT suggesting that all believing athletes are so shallow but for many I get the feeling that "give all the credit to Jesus" guys are performing a luck ritual to ward off the jealousy of the gods.

Literature and holy books are full of stories of arrogant men being brought down by god or the gods because the gods thought the man was getting too big for his britches, just a bit too successful for their liking.

Repeating that phrase in public is a dime store spell to ward off the negative attention of the gods.

Of course that is no stranger than any form of believing that the creator and maintainer of the vast universe is watching you and wanting you to win at sports or that such a power could be manipulated to serve your personal ends.

Guys, before everyone goes crazy with this, just please keep in mind that he never said that Jesus helped him win the tourney, he just said that he felt his presence. So please put away your strawmen, you can burn them again some other time. much obliged.
-- Jeremy

What do you mean, "strawmen"?! How was anything in any of the preceding posts a strawman argument? I'm sort of suspecting that you might not actually comprehend what a strawman argument is at all -- I mean, if you try to employ it in this way, it seems as if you have absolutely no clue at all, as to what the hell it means...

Is there some kinda website out there, for ignorant assholes who would like to pretend to be smarter than they really are? "Throw this into the conversation, and you will appear to be very smrt: 'strawman.' "

It's a cyclical thing -- it goes in waves. Suddenly, you see idiots throwing terms like that around all over the place -- incorrectly. Everything is accused of being a strawman argument all of a sudden. Then, everything is a red fucking herring, or some other logical fallacy.

That's the thing about the internets, you know... You can pretend to be a fully functional human being, with a fully functional brain. You got a spell checker, a thesaurus, and you can pretend to smart -- when you really ought to be sitting in the corner, blowing on a fucking moonshine jug or knocking a couple of spoons together.

Strawman, my ass -- get off the Internet, you fucktard.

Only people who do not know the Lord can make the kind of mocking comments found here. God by definition is everywhere present, and omniscient. So he is at the golf course, the fights, and with the starving children in Africa without straining at all.

Wahahahahhahahahaha! Shit, I missed that comment. That's hilarious! So God really is with the starving children in Africa? How come he doesn't give them anything to eat, then?

I mean, I don't think that I'm a particularly nice, charitable or wonderful person, but if I were omnipotent and could conjure things out of thin air, I would definitely give food to people who were starving to death. In fact, if an omnipotent person didn't do that, I'd consider that person to be a very nasty person indeed.

What is God doing in Africa? Close to 30,000 children die every single day from starvation, or easily preventable nutritionally related problems -- and you're suggesting that there is an all-loving, all-caring, omnipotent creature watching it all? You have gotta be out of your mind!

I was expecting those bumper stickers to be amusingly ironic, not just more pushy religious crap.

For shame Karen Finley, for shame.

www."Choose life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family. Choose a fucking big television, Choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players, and electrical tin openers. Choose good health, low cholesterol and dental insurance. Choose fixed- interest mortgage repayments. Choose a starter home. Choose your friends. Choose leisure wear and matching luggage. Choose a three piece suite on hire purchase in a range of fucking fabrics. Choose DIY and wondering who you are on a Sunday morning. Choose sitting on that couch watching mind-numbing sprit- crushing game shows, stuffing fucking junk food into your mouth. Choose rotting away at the end of it all, pishing you last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish, fucked-up brats you have spawned to replace yourself. Choose your future. Choose life".com

Dude... Smoking pot is cool. Watching Trainspotting is okay too -- as is watching trainspotting while smoking pot.

But you know, put the fucking bong down before you post things on the Internet. Settle down, Beavis.

Actually, dude, smoking pot is not cool* and Trainspotting is only a good but not brilliant film.

Neither of which were required to simply copy and paste the above in response to the some pushy religious bitch.

*Not for me anyway. I am however drunk right now though.

Good day sir.

"Strawman, my ass -- get off the Internet, you fucktard."

A straw man argument is a logical fallacy based on misrepresentation of an opponent's position. So far I've read a bunch of opinions that are stating that Zak's comments were supposedly him saying that Jesus helped him win the tourney, well he didn't say that, instead that is the implication that many here apparently WANT to draw. So, yeah, those are straw men. I just wish I could give your post that much credit. You obviously think that four letter words are the way intelligence is proven.

Giving praise to God after a game is not the same as crediting God for the win, saying so IS a straw man. But, if it makes you feel better about ripping on people and discrediting their faith then feel free to continue, not that you were going to stop anyways.

BTW, dialogue includes voices that sound different than your own. Ya'll should try it some time. I hereby dub thee Kings of the internet!

p.s. don't worry about my return, there will be no danger of that. I wouldn't want to disrupt the droning monologue.

I have to say I am saddened. Onegoodmove is one of my A-list go-to blogs. I find it clever, thoughtful, intelligent, challenging, funny and educational. But never hateful and never despising of other people. Until today I found it one of the things that demonstrated what is deeply good about the US and Americans when there are so many things that are not, at least at the top. So I am disappointed at the sort of language and sentiments that have been expressed in some of these comments. Perhaps I was wrong to hope for better.

I see that dzwonka is busy being rude and crude again today... too bad.

I agree that the way he repsonds does not improve communication.

Anyway, I don't think that anyone was building any strawmen.

After winning the Masters, Johnson credits The Master Thursday, Apr 12, 2007 By Art Stricklin http://www.bpsports.net/bpsports.asp?ID=5559

"Being Easter Sunday, I feel very blessed and honored and I feel like there was a power that was walking with me and guiding me. So that's where things stand. You know, I feel very blessed and honored to be here."

Here's an interesting article from last year's Ryders Cup in Ireland.

http://www.ireland.com/sports/rydercup2006/features/republican.htm Bruce Selcraig on why so many US golfers align themselves to right-wing politics and born-again Christianity

Wow, I didn't think I'd start another religious war by putting this clip in Norm's inbox.

Just goes to show how important some people think religion is, huh?

Wow, I didn't think I'd start another religious war by putting this clip in Norm's inbox.

Shame on he who calls himself pedantsareus. A rabble-rouser and a wonderful source of appropriate snark.

Every time I see "Jesus Saves," I always remember a wonderful piece of graffiti from my hometown of Port Huron, MI.

Under a bridge, someone had spent a lot of time hand-painting "Jesus Saves" on the embankment wall. Someone else had come along and spray-painted, "Green Stamps" right underneath it. "Jesus Saves Green Stamps."

"Jesus Saves" will ALWAYS bring me a smile.

--mf

Oh dear, I was being rude? And even -- dare I even say it? -- even crude, too? Good heavens, what could possibly have gotten into me?

A representative of a xenophobic, homophobic, child-molesting, misogynistic, murderous, torturous religious faith that has been oppressing rational thought for the last couple of millennia drops by with a comment, and I dare to retort in a rude and crude manner -- gosh, it's almost as if I'm suspecting myself of being a bad person or something. Discrediting people's faith and stuff...

Shouldn't you be screaming "heretic!" or "heathen!" at me and have me burnt at the stake or something? Oh yeah, I'm sorry. I forget. You can't do that any more. My bad. Those were the good old days, uh?

How many flies you catchin' with that vinegar, Dzwonka?

Dzwonka, I'm not a doctor but I played a doctor in a TV series, long ago. It is my TV medical opinion that you need a few good tokes. Why don't you come by my office and help me initiate the new bong. BC's best bud. :)

Dzwonka- This may just be your most thoughtful and rational post so far. As it happens I agree more or less with your assessment of christianity as far as it goes which is not far. You may notice that you have automatically assumed that people who have disagreed with your manner must be christians. You are wrong in this. While in this reflective mood perhaps you will also notice that the screechingly hateful way you have addressed these people does not differ in quality or in kind from the charateristics which you enumerate and which say you so despise in christianity. Perhaps this will be your very own Road to Damascus?

How many flies you catchin' with that vinegar, Dzwonka?

A few. Couple of Jesusfreaks, and also one Muslim (I was kinda miffed when he gave his prayer mat to my buddy -- I really wanted that thing, but I guess he probably thought I'd defile it or something. He was probably right).

I've also taught two people how to juggle. I'm not sure which effort I'm the most proud of.

So yeah this "vinegar" as you put it -- it actually fucking works. If you have the balls to stand up and tell people that this shit is insane and makes no fucking sense -- sometimes, people actually get it.

You just gotta stand up for what's right.

"You may notice that you have automatically assumed that people who have disagreed with your manner must be christians. You are wrong in this."

In fact, what bugs me the most, is when atheists/agnostics don't bother standing up for what's right. What bugs me is when an atheist says idiot things like "you must respect everyone's faith."

Fuck that.

If a person's faith says that women must walk around covered from head to toe, like some kinda goddamn pup-tent -- fuck that faith. The faith that says gay people go to hell -- fuck that faith. The faith that says you can't eat salad or wear blue clothes -- ya know wut? Fuck that too. That's pretty fucking dumb even if it isn't quite as harmful.

But more than that -- far beyond that -- if you do not have that faith; if you know better -- and you stand back and say, "we must respect their faith" -- ya know, fuck you, buddy. You're an apologist. That's really fucked up. Please -- stand up for reason, and sense.

Oh yeah, and how bloody clever -- road to Damascus, har fuckin' har. That's Paul, ain't it? That's the dickhead who basically got the ball rolling -- taking Christianity to the uh, what's the Jewish word for non-Jews? Gentiles, right? Blah.

Glad you got the irony. The point is not that you must respect their faith. I certainly don't. The point is about respecting them. As human beings. Not because you should but because you can and it makes a difference and it makes a better world. Go all you like at their faith, as far as I'm concerned. The thing is, Dzwonka, you are a show-off and a bully who screams and swears in people's faces (metaphorically) and bullies only get to be bullies because people let them get away with it. Bullies need to be stood up to just the way you say we should stand up to people who believe in an imaginary friend in the sky.

The point is not that you must respect their faith. I certainly don't. The point is about respecting them. As human beings.

If your significant other woke up one day and decided to be a neo-Nazi, would you say, "Honey, I don't agree with, or respect your opinions on national socialism -- but I respect you as a person!" ? Fuck off. I don't respect the faith of Jim Jones or David Koresh, and I don't respect them as human beings either. Their opinions -- their faith -- is what they were. How can you distinguish a person, from a person's opinion?

Well, I suppose that's just something that comes with maturity. Out of interest, how many "fucks" and "fucking"s does it usually take for you to convince someone to change their opinion or just get really scared of you?

What, being a hypocrite is something that "comes with maturity"?

Now, the second sentence in your post, about my use of all the words in the English language -- that really was completely pointless, and utterly insincere.

Dzwonka is right, showing respect for irrational beliefs is hypocritical. We tolerate those with such beliefs, freedom of speech, freedom to be a fucking idiot. *Toleration in this context is not respect. * I may differ a bit from Dzwonka in that if a person's religious beliefs are not of the kind that directly lead to fucking up the world. I might respect that person as a person for other reasons. He has a flaw, don't we all, but he doesn't try to turn the flaw into a law. I still don't respect the belief however. There is a continuum here, if they move very far along it toward the fundamentalist mentality, the flaw becomes so great that I no longer can respect the person. When reason fails to convince ridicule is sometimes an effective way to get someone to reconsider the basis for their belief. When someone says that they believe in astrology, that it provides them with reliable guidance in their lives it illicits a belly-laugh from me. If someone say they've seen bigfoot. I relate how George Bush hangs out in front of my house scavaging in my garbage some nights. I've seen him do it. Showing respect for any stupid belief is exactly the wrong thing to do. There are any number of ways to combat such thinking and Dzwonka's method has its place.

When reason fails to convince ridicule is sometimes an effective way to get someone to reconsider the basis for their belief.

I agree, but if one doesn't try patient, repeated arguments for reason before resorting to ridicule, one is being counterproductive to the cause of getting people to use their brains.

Dzwonka is asking that we "give ridicule a chance". But it doesn't work like that. Diplomacy and open debate comes first. If your opponent fails to engage in kind, then you can be disrespectfully dismissive.

However, people who are pre-emptively hostile come off as assholes.

Also, from the commenting policy:

Criticize ideas. Do not criticize people.

I have no sympathy for people whose argument contains the ad hominem fallacy.

We make judgments all the time. There are many who come here who are nothing more than trolls. Reason is not going to cut it with them. If it is obvious that is what you're dealing with beginning with ridicule is as good as anything. It's nice you quote the commenting policy but you left off the sentence that follows:

This means do not substitute criticism of the person for criticism of the idea.

If one is doing both, criticizing the idea on its merits and also ridiculing the person he is not commiting the ad hominem fallacy.

This is getting way OT, but I have to ask:

Strawman, my ass -- get off the Internet, you fucktard. -- Dzwonka

...is this kind of behaviour acceptable?

Ask Don (a Vicrorian term of respect, Don) Imus all about ad hominem off-the-cuffs. Neo-Victorian "honor," all the rest.

Hominem, Homo, is overrunning this planet, with Jesus's blessing (and Allah's), with all the thoughtfulness of a Cancer tumor or a Bacteria bloom in a petri dish.

What is now only words, will metastasize into actions, elsewhere, elsewhen.

We will be in deep do-do. either way. Heads in the sand or not.

Personally, IF Jesus did it (will do it, return, I mean), I will be signing up to fight on the side of the Army of the Beast. I respect "the Beast" more than I do anyone who can remain religious, post-9/11, post Katrina, Bush, Ayatollah K., all the rest, Koresh too.

God tortures, eternally, Hitler's victims were allowed to die. The "Left Behind" readers enjoy this. I would enjoy fighting them.

I'm rooting for The Beast, Blond or not, ad hominem, contra hominem, pro hyperathroponinem, either way!

And that troll under the bridge? To Rodney King's Greener Pastures, where we all just get along? He eats Sheep as well as Goats. In fact he prefers them :{.

!

?

:{

[The above is a pair of eyes over a Victorian Mustache, technically known as a "bigot". Cowboy Poets, ad hominem Philosophers, etc. who wear such a :{ are said to be "bigoted," as they are, technically.]

e.g., Imus :{

Dzwonka :{ ?

Whatever you're smoking (or drinking), one evil axis, you've had quite enough. Give some to Dzwonka. ;)

LOL Frenetic...

Group hug! :)

Let's all have a toke and sing some folk tunes and be happy. lol

This is getting way OT, but I have to ask:

Strawman, my ass -- get off the Internet, you fucktard.
-- Dzwonka

...is this kind of behaviour acceptable?
-- Frenetic

An ad hominem attack does of course mean an attack on the person, rather than the argument -- but as a logical fallacy, there's a basic prerequisite: that you must be prejudiced against the person who made the argument. Ie., you oppose the argument not because you disagree with the argument itself, but because you dislike the person who said it.

That's what the ad hominem fallacy is really about: it's not about calling someone a big poo-poo head or a fucktard. It's about holding a grudge against someone, and then taking potshots at them -- kinda like what Jo Ann is doing (I bruised her ego in an earlier thread -- hell hath no fury etc.). Kinda like what a few other people are doing here.

It's about prejudice, not naughty language.

I'm gonna have to start charging you people for these lessons. Logical Fallacies 101 For Lazy Fucktards Who Can't Be Bothered To Figure Shit Out By Themselves.

And to try get the thread back on topic, I wanna mention this story I read about a couple of years ago... Bank robbery gone bad, bullets sprayed around, killing several bank employees and/or customers. One of the bullets hit a nearby Burger King, and the reporter interviewed a burger flipper -- who pretty much said the same thing that the idiot golfer did. Same deal -- God was looking out for her. God didn't have any time for the people in the bank; he let those suckers get snuffed out -- but he did some awesome magic, bullet-diverting woo-woo to save the burger flipper.

kinda like what Jo Ann is doing (I bruised her ego in an earlier thread -- hell hath no fury etc.).

That's just silly dzwonka. I don't even remember what you're talking about.

Anyway, that's a sexist comment. Other people aren't comfortable with your discourse either. Roger Migently has nothing against you, and speaking of him, he responded to the same comment that you did, but in a more sophisticated and logical manner.

But if calling people fucktards is the preferred discourse on this blog, then I guess that's the way it is. It's Norm's blog.

"But if calling people fucktards is the preferred discourse on this blog, then I guess that's the way it is."

Why don't you just go ahead an offer Norm a nice sloppy blowjob in return for banning me from the blog? Go ahead, you know you want to.

Oops, hang on -- was that sexist too?

"preferred discourse" -- gosh...

dzwonka - If anyone is in dire need of a blowjob and getting laid, it's you. Anything that will help you to deal with your anger.

dzwonka - If anyone is in dire need of a blowjob and getting laid, it's you. Anything that will help you to deal with your anger.

That seems like an offer to me. I hope it's not the word fuck that people are getting upset about, Fuck is a great word.

lol Dar, that did sound like an offer, although it obviously wasn't one.

I tried your link, but after about a half hour, it still wasn't loaded.

I don't think that there's anything inherently wrong with words such as "fuck", but what I've always liked about this blog was the higher level discourse. Most of the other blogs consist of one-word sentences along the lines of "fuck you", "oh, yeah? well fuck you fuckin' fucktard". "Well your mother wears combat boots".. etc etc..

It's just sad that this blog is moving in that direction. :(

I don't think the occasional mild outburst, and it was a rather mild outburst, is indicative of this blog going down in quality. Read some past stuff here and you will find worse and the blog didn't explode. Besides, this is just the comment section of the blog.

I don't care for shouting and name calling either but there isn't enough of it around here to bother me. Perhaps I'm just an insensitive fucktard.

Silence! You sir are a blithering baffoon with a phallus the size of a quark. Begone demon of Hades...

Na, it's just not cutting it for me.

I also found the video I was looking for.

Erick, thanks for posting that, it's the first time I've seen it, good stuff.

BTW, if you've ever had your boulders dashed, boulderdash is not the word that comes to mind at the time. :)

LMAO!!!