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Peanut Butter: The Atheist's Nightmare

I'm speechless, as David the first to send me a link to this video put it, WOW, JUST WOW. Thanks to Ray as well for the heads up. I would have hated missing this one. Of course we mustn't forget the other atheist's nightmare, the banana.




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Comments

These people need to go read a book besides the bible.

I would also like to add that the food industry does not depend on the fact that evolution does not happen because a jar of peanut butter is no where close to the the same conditions as the ancient earth. Let's also hope that jar of peanut butter wasn't sitting on the shelf for 10 million years either.

My god, they've done it! lol

Umm... evolution doesn't deal with the generation of life from non-life. It only describes the selection of heritable variation. Some of those principles are undoubtedly relevant in a theory of how life began in the first place, but the process of evolution itself doesn't begin until there's already some way for traits to be passed on via an error-prone replication mechanism.

Evolution itself is entirely compatible with a view that the first life was put there. There are much better theories about the origin of life, but they are somewhat distinct from evolution itself.

The point is, even if the argument in the video made any sense whatsoever, it wouldn't have any bearing on whether evolution happens.

I should note that the evolutionary process is not restricted to things with DNA, by any means. The underlying principles are almost certainly relevant in explaining how life as we know it came about via a series of chemical reactions that didn't evolve what we'd call "life". Still.

don't engage with peanut brains

a glib fallacy intelligently designed to again arm the masses of christ followers with the power to engage, frustrate and stifle any person who truly want to understand the miracle of life

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STUPENDOUS!

This is as good as the banana lunacy.

If I wasn't already intimately acquainted with the prodigious insanity of Creationists, I would call this an obvious satire.

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My head hurts after watching that. If that guy is an engineer, I want to know what kind and I want to stay far, far away from anything he's worked on. Geeez these guys are absolutely, freakin' out of their gonzo minds. Excuse me while I take something for this throbbing pain in my skull.

So let me get this straight:

In the beginning, the world was a giant vat of peanut butter, sealed air-tight in a protective jar to ensure no life could grow. It was then shipped around, exposed to very little temperature change, and had an expiry date printed on the side, because after a certain date, things might actually start growing in it. And since Earth was used before it went past its expiry date, no life grew. So since this didn't happen, evolution is false. I had no idea!

Have I missed something here? Has the delicious, creamy and jam-covered world gone fucking mad? Comparing peanut butter, an organic product which comes from something which grew, to a primordial ooze subjected to extreme temperatures and lightning storms and all sorts of geothermal abuse couldn't make any less sense if I tried. So I'll give them a new argument:

'I don't want to believe in evolution, because we as humans have the power to rationalise and feel emotions, and act on those emotions. It seems illogical that the world could evolve and produce vast amounts of relatively stupid creatures, save a certain breed of humans that have vast amounts of intellect, so much so that we are self-aware and can feel emotional attractions to others, love, hate, a relationship with God that created us. That's why evolution doesn't make sense.'

Wait, no, that's still pretty fucking stupid.

Actually ... I believe there was salmonella in some of those peanut butter jars. Isn't that "evidence" of "new life" in peanut butter jars? Or did God put the salmonella in there? :D

"I say! You've got peanut butter all over my bible!"

"No I haven't, you've got bible in my peanut butter!"

Last time it was a banana. This time peanut butter?

Next time they need to figure out how bread will work in the equation. Then we can make peanut butter and banana sandwiches and shove 'em down all their non-scientific throats!

Yeesh!

....despite a long running marketing campaign, the good people at Smucker's found to their surprise that 'Primordial Ooze' didn't sell nearly as well as their other, more popular products....

Friggin' wow...creationists are really reaching for things to "back up" there beliefs.

These people a mentally deranged. The reason nothing grows in packed food such as bags of chips, jars of food, condensed foods, or dry foods is because they are either vacuum sealed, they lack water moisture, or get no sun light.

And as we all know, for life to exist you need at least water and oxygen. Plant matter of course requires sun light and water.

Other foods are packed so full of preservatives that it is impossible for it to spoil (become riddled with bacteria).

What an R-tard.

I would think that even many people who believe in evolution would find that as crazy as everyone else.

With respect to Ray Comfort's banana example: Could one not also argue that a cucumber is the perfect shape to be inserted into a vagina or rectum? Using deductive logic it is safe to assume God is surely a pervert!

This is actually a very old argument. Louis Pasteur did a series of clever experiments to show that airborne bacteria causes mold to grow on milk and that maggots hatch from eggs laid by flies in rotting meat. At the time, these were two examples of how living things could spontaneously grow from dead matter. He demonstrated these phenomena in order to show that life can not begin spontaneously, and thus Darwin's theory had no valid starting place. This may, however, have been the last valid science done in the name of creationism since then.

But can he explain how my jar of peanut butter nonetheless contains organic matter the presence of which on any other planet would surely indicate the possibility of life? What's that? The manufacturer put it in there. I thought the whole thing smelled of intelligent design.

where does this video come from? can anybody provide a link?

Oh for Christ's sake. One of YouTube's featured videos for today might be a nice antidote. See "Creation Science 101" (currently the third video down):

http://www.youtube.com/

I don't know how long they keep a featured video up, so in case it disappears from there:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uIwiPsgRrOs

Please tell that to the cornbread on my kitchen counter.

Ants?? So all this time THAT'S where the mold was coming from!?! Amazing...

We're all dumber for having listened to that man speak.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2z-OLG0KyR4

a christian once gave me a tract with that same bit on one of the pages...

the "...nightmare" part is what made me think of it.

I.Ders are fucking insane.

Since when did evolution mean abiogenesis?

This is all built on a false argument that accuses the scientific theory of evolution of dumbly stating that all life came from absolutely nothing. They've constructed an argument they think they can win and distract attention from the truth. The differences are that the scientific theory states that many species came from a single cell. They replace "species" with "all life" and "a single cell" with "nothing." There's your confusion that will hold up to one-sided debate.

And certainly, no ever said life appeared spontaneously...

This can't be for real! Please someone tell me this is just a lost clip from the Daily Show or Real Time. To think otherwise makes me very very sad.

So many wasted jars of peanut butter i just ate, instead of proving evolution didnt happen. Ive wasted my life.

Bwahahaha. Wow. That was complete tripe.

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"Babies come from Mommy's Butt and Peanut Butter Saves Jesus: Collected Stories to Save Your Children from the Atheist Nightmare"

Of course, evolution looks ridiculous to people who think the earth is 6000 years old. Millions to billions of years may be required for just a chance of life. Scientists substitute time and chemistry for god in the origin of life.

The differences are that the scientific theory states that many species came from a single cell. They replace "species" with "all life" and "a single cell" with "nothing."

That life originally came from non-life is a central concept of evolution. The first 'living' things may not have resembled any single cell alive today. They certainly wouldn't be able to compete with anything alive today.

actually, sll I could think about when I was listening to this attempt at complete distraction and confusion on the issue of the origin of life is: this is just like what Michael Crichton sounds like when he talks about climate change!

did you all hear this "debate" on NPR? Norm, you might consider culling it for excerpts.

sad thing is (and I'm ruining the suspense for you here) the Crichton side actually won the debate (audience before and after poll).

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=9082151

link here in case that gets broken

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Are they born that stupid or do they work at it?

unfreakingbelievable....wow...that really did look like a SNL skit.

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"And as we all know, for life to exist you need at least water and oxygen. Plant matter of course requires sun light and water."

About that, oxygen is harmful to the first kind of organism's I been told, that is why theory was something more like that we had a different atmosphere before life came to earth, the oxygen we have now came from million of years of organic respirations, scientists have been able to create simple organic molecules such as proteins and such in experiments - Life can occur in the right conditions, but a jar of peanut butter is not one of them

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Dare I also mention that the guy you see in the start was in another video were he claimed that Grand Canyon was carved by the same flood that caused the world to be flooded in Noah's Ark

So let me get this straight. If I get a degree in engineering that makes me a biologist. That's like getting an English degree makes me a heart surgeon. Perhaps next time my car has mechanical problems I won't waste my time with a mechanic, I'll go to a circus clown to get it fixed. Is this video a conspiracy to make bible thumping fundamentalist creationists look dumber than they already are?

The peanut butter example could just as easily be used to prove that God does not exist.

If, after many tests of opening peanut butter, we never discover any miraculous organisms emerge, then this proves that God never created life miraculously.

Absurd reasoning devoid of logic? Of course it is!!

If life is supposed to originate from peanut butter, does that mean I have to have primordial soup on my toast?

I'm speechless. Teh Stupid. It burns

RE: the banana argument. Does that mean Satan designed the pineapple, artichoke, wheat, potato, cows, pork, coconut, walnut, etc. since those foods are a bit harder to eat? So we should only eat bananas?

I suppose if the banana were the [i]perfect food[/i] and that all humanity lived on them eating nothing else.... No, I'd still think they were full of crap.

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They call evolution a fairy tale and then read the bible stories and think they're real?! It's incredible to what extremes of idiocy people will drag themselves just to hold on to a belief.

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I was hoping that when he opened the peanut butter those "nuts in a can" snakes jumped out. In fact, I half expected it.

But it's chunky peanut butter!

That was the stupidest thing I've ever seen. It reminds me of the time I had to clean out a colleagues desk, and found a book that claimed to conclusively disprove evolution, in less than 100 pages of very large print, with no footnotes or other references. The logic was a probably a lot like that moron in the video, for all I know he wrote it.

Sometimes you don't have to read something to know it's bullshit.

This shit just makes me want to cry.

But I'm not sure what depresses me the most -- that people can hold such insane beliefs, or that those of us that know better than this, enable the crazy bastards to hold such beliefs, simply because we are too 'polite' to tell them that they are batshit fucking insane.

I don't think you can stop religion, or prevent it -- and I don't think you should ban it. Don't get me wrong, if banning it fixed the problem, I'd be all for it -- but banning religion just fuels the desire for martyrdom. The underlying problem is superstition, and you know -- general stupidity.

But I do think you should seriously discourage religion. Religion should be something that people would be embarrassed to admit to believing in. A co-worker of mine once admitted to believing in astronomy, and lent me a couple of books on the topic -- but she begged me to not tell anyone about her interest in the subject...

That is how religion should be perceived, in our modern world: As something that a person might -- but should not -- believe in. As something that is idiotic, and acknowledged as being idiotic, to the point where you'd be embarrassed to admit believing in it.

I was an atheist since back when I realized Santa was BS, but this video has a good point. How could God not exist if life don't spontaneously appear when exposing a jar of organic matter? It just doesn't make sense!

It's a perfect Chewbacca Defense! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chewbacca_Defense

By this "logic," finding mold in a single jar of peanut butter would disprove the existence of God. We should ban peanut butter to make sure this will never happen.

I don't think the food industry is based on the fact that evolution doesn't happen. I think the food industry is based on the fact that God not putting random shit in processed foods to, as Bill Hicks put it, to "fuck with us".

"I'll put some dinosaur bones here to fool everyone! I'm killing myself, yay!"

(back on topic)

Seriously, the food industry is based around the fact that most bacteria and single celled organisms cannot survive extreme temperature change. There are bacteria that live in volcanos that would die at room temperature. There are anarobic bacteria that can live without air, but shrivel up and lay dormant in the presence of oxygen.

Never has a more false portrayal of evolution existed.

Wow - that was sad. Where did that video clip come from?

Nicklas Rahbek, the topic of what our atmosphere was made of is covered very well in the book "Rare Earth"(though the actual topic the book discusses is different). If no one here has read it I highly recommend it (I myself have only read about half so far, it's a pretty dense read, but fascinating). Here is another link I found that also discusses the early atmosphere of the earth: http://www.ux1.eiu.edu/~cfjps/1400/atmos_origin.html

Also, I recently heard that the tour guides at the Grand Canyon have been told to not discuss how the Grand Canyon was formed, due to the fact that so many people believe it was created by the "flood". I guess the policy was instituted so as not to cause problems with those people while on a tour.

Can anyone confirm or deny if this is actually the case? I tried a Google search but was unable to come up with anything.

If I make a peanut butter and banana sandwich for lunch, will Jesus appear in the sandwich? I've always wanted to meet him, and little did I know it was the jelly that was keeping us apart.

Reality is Scientists have been able to form life(at least in its most simple form) by running electricity through a primordial ooze.

I don't think they tried it with peanut butter. or looked for gods word written in the design of banana peels. Silly Scientists

Godless science says that the Earth is round... but when I place a soccer ball in the middle of a field, it does not roll away and fall off into space.

I have now proven that the world is flat. It's the Heliocentricist's Worst Nightmare.

I third the "WOW!" and raise with a "YIKES".

Note to self: Lobby for "Logic" (a la Philosophy not math) to be taught in grade school.

Creationists scare me...but just a little...'cuz they be some dim witted crazies.

By "respecting" people's religions, you are invited THESE people to come and recruit your children. And unlike the gays, these people actually do go out and recruit children.

Wow ... that was a parody, right?! :-)

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I third the "WOW!" and raise with a "YIKES".

Note to self: Lobby for "Logic" (a la Philosophy not math) to be taught in grade school.

Creationists scare me...but just a little...'cuz they be some dim witted crazies.

Sus
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book discusses is different). If no one here has read it I highly recommend it (I myself have only read about half so far, it's a pretty dense read, but fascinating). Here is another link I found that also discusses the early atmosphere of the earth: http://www.ux1.eiu.edu/~cf
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By "respecting" people's religions, you are invited THESo be taught in grade school.

Creationists scare me...but just a little...'cuz they be some dim witted crazies.

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