A Moment of Zen
James Wolcott had a similar take on Andrew Sullivan's appearance on Bill Maher's program last night, but James noticed something I missed Andrew Sullivan's performance with his hind-quarters. I've captured the video, and I'll let you be the judge, is Andy just making some innocent adjustments or is something more interesting afoot.
Andrew Sullivan responds.
SLATE HITS BOTTOM: Yep, they have an entire article on the fact that at the end of HBO's "Real Time with Bill Maher" (transcript here), I got up and readjusted my power-glutes. Slow news day? It was the first thing my boyfriend pointed out to me when I called him after the show. The reason? Slate demands an answer. It itched.
Sometimes my suspicious nature saves me from myself.I was about to post a semi-sincere apology to Andrew Sullivan. In my book, I argued that however much he flirted with abandoning Bush, he would never unlash himself from the Marlboro Man, having invested so much in this tender masochistic relationship. I was wrong. After much agon, Sullivan did cast his vote for Kerry, which caused him no end of grief from fellow conservatives who probably never liked gays anyway and now had an excuse to vent their Disillusionment with Andrew for defecting.
As I say, an apology seemed in order.
But after watching Sullivan make an ass of himself (in more ways than one) on HBO's Real Time with Bill Maher, forget it.
[snip]
The strangest thing in the broadcast happened when the show was over. The panelists stood, Sullivan's back to the camera, and as the credits rolled, he began squeezing, massaging his own buttocks with his hands. I thought he might be trying to dislodge a thong strap that had run up rather deep, but no, he seemed to be feeling up his own butt. I've never seen anything quite like it, unless I was hallucinating, and if I start hallucinating about Andrew Sullivan copping a feel of his own butt, it's time to check into the clinic for a little Elizabeth Wurtzel layoff.
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ahhahahahhahahahaha he did that cuz he wanna shake maher's hand
Excellent rearsearch work, Norm.
I think Sully was digging in to find his truce before the FMA took his baby away.
Maybe his brain fell asleep and he was trying to massage it back to life.
My first thought was he plans to do a Goatse on TV.
obviously, he'd gotten his shorts in a bunch.
I think he was checking to make sure his butt plug was still inserted.
I think he was checking to make sure his butt plug was still inserted.
You guys just keep makin your cracks about the gays! Put that in your pipe and smoke it! flips out
Heheh .. ;) Re: previous clip.
He's not known as Andrew "Power Glutes" Sullivan for nothing. He's gotta keep those cheeks toned up and ready for action.
And now... your moment of Zen.
I'm confused; is this a crack (n.p.i) at Sullivan's homosexuality? Sullivan would surely take it with equaniminty, since as a Republican he's heard much worse from his own party. But he may wonder whether we'd be making bum jokes about a lefty gay man in this situation.
The fact that this is even offered as comment, shows evidence of the sorry azz state of the Un-United States. Who gives a rip?
I'll tell you what he is doing. He just realized that he just got his butt kicked by Bill Maher, and it hurts! LOL
He's showing that, other evidence to the contrary, he CAN TOO find his ass with both hands.
Perhaps he was massaging the "Milky loads?"
For someone who clearly aspires to celebrity, Sullinvan seems to have a remarkably poor instinct for public-image self-preservation.
Gotta loosen 'em up before you pry 'em apart. How else can he get his head back up there?
More importantly, did anybody notice that Sullivan doesn't seem to know the difference between "casualties" and "dead". This is in reference to his ridiculous post-Chomsky tirade. And does he actually believe that America could have just gone in and taken the oil fields, without dealing with Saddam or any WMD/humanitarian talk, as he claimed?
new rule: more comfy seat cushions for Maher's guests
maybe the gerbil got loose.
Come on, y'all have never auto-wedgied? Never had your tighty-whities get stuck in your crack before? Cut the poor guy some slack.
Now he's going to be the butt of all kinds of jokes.
couldn't top any of those but I needed a laugh & you all gave me a good one. Thanks
it's a medical thing. he was reducing his risk of blood clots after sitting so long.
He got a good bufu last night, and he was rubbing his sore bottom.
"Gotta loosen 'em up before you pry 'em apart. How else can he get his head back up there?" -Bilbo
Good one!
I've tried to see things from Sully's point of view, but I couldn't get my head that far up my own ass.
I saw that and noticed it. I thought it might have had something to do with sitting down for an hour, but maybe he was having a wardrobe malfunction. He might have been adjusting his transmitter.
haha..that doesn't look like a massage. it looks like some dildo is stuck up there i think..
honestly, i do the same thing when i've been sitting for too long, but i hope i've have the presence of mind to avoid doing it in front of a camera on national tv.
am I just imagining this, or is there some kind of brown stain on those pants?
Leave the poor guy alone. He's obviously got a serious case of hemorrhoids.
He's just adjusting himself. After the unlubricated double team he took from Pat Schroeder and DH Hughley, anyone in a similar situation would do the same thing.
Bush Concedes Defeat
This just in:
GW Bush has announced his concession of the 2004 presidential election to John Kerry. “Yes, America has spoken", sighed a clearly exasperated Bush at this afternoon’s press conference. “But so has Karl Rove, through the radio transmitter I had hidden in my suit jacket during all 3 debates during the campaign". “As a self-declared man of morals, I have reached the painful conclusion that I am not worthy of being president of the United States. “Any guy who would be willing to cheat during a debate in the way I did, cannot be trusted in any public office. Nobody really knows what other tricks I may have used to undermine public confidence in this race and in the previous election. But I think it is obvious that I am capable of pretty much anything and for this reason my conscience cannot allow me to accept vi tory in this election".
Sullivan just had a headache and was trying to rub it out.
You people are sick. He's been on Kerry's side for a long time, and just because he tries to make some sense out of this election and why Democrats lost, you trash him now. He's one of the smartest political analysts out there, in that he has a great ability to see a point from both perspectives. Bill Maher couldn't last two minutes with him in a debate; just because he has audience that will clap for him every time he speaks, he thinks he's the smart one. His last show was horrible, mainly because Alan Simpson put him in his place at the start of the show, and he never recovered.
Did you see... a different show than the rest of us?
Making jokes isn't sick, it's just for shits & giggles. Get over it. It's still a free country, for now anyway...
No, no,... that's secret sign language that only Dubya understands. Roughly translated, in my best Tenille voice, he's saying:
Do that to me one more time once is never enough with a man like you whoa-oh-oh, do that to me one more time I can never get enough of a man like you
And for those "newbies" who don't get the "milky loads," "muscle glutes" references: http://milkyloads.tripod.com
If Andrew has a butt plug, then Bush's bulge must have been a cockring. F**K you all.
If Andrew has a butt plug, then Bush's bulge must have been a cockring.
Nah, Dubya's "bulge" was actually a can of Pop N Fresh canned biscuits that accidentally fell into Dubya's shorts.
It's very simple. What's really going on is that Andrew is trying to scratch an itchy butthole. You'll see that in the first part of the video, where he actually reaches in deep for the itch. Then, afraid of stinky finger, he moves his fingers outward and begins moving his butcheeks to and fro to self scratch his itchy butt. There it is. Explained.
Sullivan has an AIDS condition called lipothrophy..fat loss of the face and limbs and butt..causes painfull sitting...regardless, the real issue is that he is a huge right wing asshole and its fun to make jokes ta his expense.
Glutegate,eh? I wonder if he doesn't have gluteal implants due to wasting caused by AIDS drugs. Could those gel implants need "plumping" after being seated a while? Just a theory.